Proust, week #18:

If you could change one thing about  yourself, what would it be?

The following ad was found in X-Men No. 6 (July, 1964) and goes to show how arbitrary our beauty ideals are: 

How many women these days do you think would slink away in tears of shame should someone dare call them “skinny?” Not many, I’d wager.

However, this ad also reminds us that the phenomenon of women (and also, apparently, men, boys and convalescents) voluntarily subjecting themselves to “treatments” that are probably useless (and possibly even harmful) is nothing new. And it’s all in the name of attaining whatever beauty ideal is worshipped at that particular cultural moment.

This is precisely why I refuse to get caught up in any of this bullshit. What’s considered “hot” today hasn’t always been considered hot, and likely won’t be in the future.

It just ain’t worth it.

Despite some monster-sized wind gusts, I survived the Red Bud 5K. It actually wasn’t as bad as I’d feared.

Don’t get me wrong – the first half of the run was directly into the wind, and really kind of sucked balls, but at least I had the wind at my back for most of the second half. Plus, I had my iPod with me this time around, which helped a lot. It’s amazing what a little TV on the Radio can do for a sagging energy level.

Actually, when all is said and done, this 5K was quite a bit easier than my first one. I shaved a little off my time (my chip time was 36:51), and didn’t feel quite so much like I was going to die as I crossed the finish line.

Well, I take that back.

Although my heart and lungs felt fine this time around, I did feel perilously close, right at the end, to throwing up all over the place. In fact, I think I actually crossed the finish line with one hand clamped tightly over my mouth. I’m blaming the foul-tasting water I drank at the second water stop. (I guess the lesson learned was this: never drink water that was handed to you by a dude dressed like Darth Vader.)

With that being said though, the thing I love most about the Red Bud is the volunteers. They make it such a fun experience. Dwight said that the two-mile course was spray-painted with neon footsteps, and several of the yards he passed were decorated with running shoes and other Red Bud-themed paraphernalia.

On my course, there was a band set up near the halfway point, and the aforementioned Star Wars people manning the second water stop. I really have to give it up to these folks. A couple hundred feet or so ahead of the water stop, I started seeing yard signs with messages like, “May the force be with you,” “Cantina ahead” and “Help me, Obi-Wan.” At the actual water stop, there was a sound system set up, playing the music from the cantina scene – and a girl dressed as Princess Leia holding the sign, “Water to the left, Powerade to the right.” Somehow, even after having just run about two and half miles, I managed to giggle.

That was quickly followed by the small thrill I got from wantonly tossing my empty water cup onto someone’s ginormous, perfectly-manicured Nichols Hills lawn.

And sticking around to cheer on our good friend Jessika – who totally kicked ass in the 10K.

And the post-run beers at McNellie’s.

It was a great day.

Now, it’s time to assess my progress. I know I can handle the distance of a 5K, so I feel like there’s room now to push myself a bit harder on my speed. I’d like to take a minute or so off my time for my next run, which is the Bricktown Blaze on May 2nd. And perhaps I’m still simply riding that post-run high, but I’m even beginning to think about the previously unthinkable – perhaps tackling a 10K in 2010.

All I know is this: running makes me feel like such a badass. For the first time in my life, my body doesn’t feel like the enemy. It’s not something to hate and fear and fight against. I feel strong and capable and alive. Thinness or fatness is irrelevant. I never thought I would be able to run a 5K, especially in tough Oklahoma winds. Realizing that I’m capable of doing just that makes me feel so much more awesome than being a size two ever could.

And this is why I’m hooked on running.

It seems like just the other day I was up in Tulsa, huffing and puffing through my very first 5K – and now it’s already time for Round Two. This Sunday afternoon, you’ll find me (and a horde of others) running through Nichols Hills in the Red Bud Classic.

I’ve been obsessively checking the weather forecasts all week. Although Sunday seems like it will be nice enough – sunny, with highs in the mid-50s – my heart sank when I saw the big “Windy!!!” graphic.

I’ve learned in the past few weeks that I really, really loathe running in the wind. (Although, I suppose that if that’s the case, I’d really better think about finding another state to run in.)

Yeah, I might be walking part of this one.

(Apologies to Jessika. The title was just too appropriate.)

Proust, week #17:

Which talent would you most like to have?